My Younger Self (#23)

Several years ago, I read a great book by Ellyn Spragins titled, What I Know Now – Letters to my Younger Self.  It highlights forty one famous women who wrote letters to their younger selves as they reflected on significant moments in their lives.

So, in case you weren’t sure, I’m not famous but I have had some pretty significant moments in my life.  And since I will be turning forty in a few weeks, I think it may be a good time to reflect on those moments and write a letter to my younger self.

Problem is, where to start?  How far back do I go?  Do I go all the way back to the small town of Detroit Lakes in the lunch room at my elementary school when I thought it was funny to shoot the juice from a grape up my nose?  (It’s okay, you can shake your head.  I know.  Cra-cra).  Or when I filed through the halls with the rest of my class, imagining I was Princess Leia – captured and surrounded by Storm Troopers – waiting to be saved by the handsome Luke Skywalker (SPOILER ALERT: this is before the sequel reveals he was her brother).

I could explore Junior High, when I ‘went with’ the boy with a pretty long trail of previous girlfriends and a reputation that preceded him.  Or is it high school when me and my besties would stop at LeeAnn Chin’s to pick up dinner and go park on Post Rd. (for those outside of the Twin Cities – this is a road that runs parallel to a runway at the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport) and watch the planes take off, while dreaming of going to far away places?  Yes.  I know.  Post road was where you should go with your boyfriend to make out.  But we didn’t have boyfriends.  And no, we didn’t make out.  Sheesh.

Then, there’s college.  I could reflect on the nights during that time, spent at a bar – sober – dancing to everything from ‘Fishin’ in the Dark’ to ‘O.P.P.’ (yeah, you know me).  There are so many CRAZY things that I did.  Where do I even start?

Ha.  I’m chuckling to myself, because those that knew me then, know that my life was NOT the least bit of crazy.  It was loads of fun, but it wasn’t crazy.  I still, to this day, have never smoked a cigarette or tried an illegal drug.  And that’s fo realz.  There’s no Bill Clinton logic here (you know – the ‘well I didn’t inhale’ excuse).  Heck, I’ve only been drunk (praying to the porcelain God drunk) once – and that didn’t happen until my Senior year in college.

I was pretty mellow – or some may say, ‘lame’.  But I don’t think so.  I’m proud that I stayed focused on doing the right things and making good choices.  And of course there are some things I’d do differently, but overall, I’m quite happy with the choices I made.

If I did write a letter to my younger self, I would tell her to:

• Have more confidence in yourself.  If you can’t believe in you, why should others?
• Stand in your truth and stand up for what you know is right
• Be conscientious and caring, good and giving, hopeful and happy
• Accept that you will make mistakes and it is good that you do.  How else will you learn?
• Laugh at yourself.  Don’t take yourself too seriously.  And most importantly, have fun.

And that’s what I’m trying to do…have fun.