We Rise

I am the mom of a totally awesome twelve year old boy, with an old soul, who has a mood disorder. We fluctuate often, between the ups and downs, the manic and depressive episodes. Then there are those seemingly magical times in the middle, our hands firmly placed on the oars, keeping course, pointing our boat in the direction of our choosing, riding along in relatively calm waters. This is a beautiful place to be. Because it is here we get to feel the sun on our face, feel the gentle rock of life’s waves as we move forward, the wind at our back.

We’re learning how to enjoy those moments more, relish in them, bask in them. But it’s hard. Human nature and life’s experiences nudge us to believe we should instead use those moments to prepare and ready ourselves for the next tide, the next turmoil, the next storm. But if we’re so busy preparing, we spend less time enjoying. When we’re so busy gripping the edges of the boat in fear, waiting for our joy to be stolen, we rob ourselves of peace of mind, contentment. We must be mindful. We must intently practice this, ‘being present’ business. All we can do is try.

When the storms hit, the boat rocks hard from side to side. We feel battered and bruised, from banging left and right, left and right. The rain hits our face hard, tears of pain and anguish roll down our faces. Sometimes, the storm is violent. Less rain, more lightning and thunder. Less sadness, more frustration and anxiousness. We learn the ebbs and flows. We try to keep in mind there is a life preserver nearby at all times. But sometimes, we just can’t reach it. Sometimes, that which is to save us seems to move further and further away from the tips of our fingers. And then, it is easy to lose HOPE.

In these moments, when our hearts are broken and HOPE seems to live on the other side of the ocean, we must still seek gratitude for where we are. We must pause and look at our surroundings, look inside. What do we have? It is easy during the chaos and turmoil, to focus on what we don’t have. To forget the blessings and possibilities. The clouds may be dark. The sun invisible. The rain pounding hard. But what happens after that? The clouds, they lighten and part. The sun, shines bright and plentiful, each of its many rays reaching from the sky to touch our hearts. The rain, it cleanses and helps bring growth.

This is not a new story I’m telling, is it? We’ve all heard multiple versions of the story of renewed strength from personal battles. We’ve all encountered it in our lives. Numerous times, in all likelihood. Yet, we still need reminders. Because life is hard. Because when our lives become troubled, the light can easily slip out. We’ve been there. Where the days feel long and we anxiously wait for the night, for the time in which we can shut out all the pain with sleep. And yet, we always make it to the next morning, to the other side of the darkness. We may stumble. We may be slow to wake. Yet, we rise.

With God’s hand, we rise.

And so in those moments, when it feels like the darkness is closing around you and you’re not sure how you can make it to the next moment? Think of the sun’s rays, God’s fingers, touching you with light. In those moments when you feel alone and broken? Remember the feeling of the warmth of the sun on your face and the power of the wind at your back. Climb into that boat of yours, hands firmly placed on your oars, and set sail. You need not know specific coordinates on the map, you must have FAITH. Point the bow forward and seek HOPE. Look up and feel LOVE.

Because with God’s hand, we rise.